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I have to vent.

I’m tired.

I’m tired of not getting answers.

I’m tired of people not caring.

I’m tired of my poor daughter being in pain.

I’m tired of the medical field not doing anything to change this.

What do I need to do?

With whom do I need to talk?

I will not give up.

I will find a way to help her get better.

Tonight my friend and neighbor stopped by to give me a gift. I also babysit for her two days a week. She is a nurse at the hospital Phebe was in this last week. She worked Thursday and would stop by Phebe’s room to check on her, and then would text me to let me know how Phebe was doing. Adrienne is an absolute angel. She knew I couldn’t get up to see Phebe so she wanted to keep me informed. After she left this evening Phebe said, “I know dat voice. She da nice lady.”

I said, “Yes, Adrienne IS very nice. We love her.”

Phebe replied, “She da only one who nice to me when you not there in hopital.”

My daughter has the mind of a 2 year old. Yes, she is in the body of an 18 year old, but that doesn’t change the fact that her mind isn’t. Can someone please explain to me why you wouldn’t treat her kindly? Three of the four days she was there she couldn’t even lift her head. It wasn’t until the last day that she was able to sit up and start talking again. So why not just treat her kindly? She wasn’t hurting anyone. She wasn’t being abusive. She wasn’t swearing or throwing things. She just had a hard time moving and couldn’t talk clearly.

She has been in pain for months. Her blood clots very strangely. Her tongue looks like white fur. She is now getting blisters all over her body for the second time. These blisters are huge and VERY painful. She can only swallow liquids and struggles with that. Sometimes when her skin gets wet it falls off. If she has a cut on her body it won’t heal or it takes months to heal. The doctors tell me there’s nothing wrong with her. It’s all in her head. The last time she was covered with blisters the doctor told me she was burning herself. Really???

I want to go to one of these doctors’ homes with my daughter and drop her off. I’ll pin a note to her saying to please return her when she is whole. I have been trying for 8 months to fix her and I am failing big time.

It isn’t fair.

It isn’t right.

The saddest part in all of this is that I adopted her from Haiti in hopes of making her life better. I feel like she would have been better off never coming to America.

I feel like I have failed her.

I feel like an awful mom.

This all needs to change and now!

Someone please help me help my daughter.

1 comments:

Stephanie B said...

I'm so sorry to hear about all these challenges. I pray that you'll be inspired to find the right people and doctors that will be able to give you the answers you seek.
From your blogs I gather that God plays an important part in your lives. So I came across a few videos clips that you might enjoy (copy and then paste link).
http://youtu.be/khfKTiXKdic and
http://youtu.be/wiiadnMvm20
It reminds us of what role we play in God's plan for us.
Take care!

-Stephanie B.